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Funniest Savage Jokes you’ve not seen

Can I ask you something?” “You are already asking

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All works and no play makes Jack a dull boy, just as popular saying goes.

Buckle up for the series of jokes that are about to hit you.

Funniest Savage Jokes you've not seen

Smiling boy

  • You know that annoying moment when you are walking around the house with socks on and step on a random wet spot.
  • I am an awesome singer…. when no one is listening.
  • The awkward moment when your teacher watches you while you are doing your test and suddenly you don’t remember anything.
  • “Can I ask you something?” “You are already asking”
  • Friends – “what a perfect morning for a run” Me – “What a perfect morning for sleeping more”
  • In boring classes I improve my drawing skills.
  • That moment when someone reminds the teacher about the homework
  • Low battery! Low battery! Low battery! Low battery! Apparently you have enough battery to remind me every 10 seconds
  • How to asleep faster? Decorate your bedroom to look like a classroom.
  • That strange moment when you walk through a big spider web and instantly turn into a karate master.
  • Friend: “How long does it take to get there?” Me: “About 10 songs”
  • Teacher: 478 + x + 2230 = 5490. Find x. Student: It is between 478 and 2230.
  • Money will not buy you happiness but it is better to cry in a sport car than on a bicycle.
  • That awkward moment when you don’t understand a joke at all but pretend to laugh and then someone asks you to explain the joke.
  • Keep the dream alive and hit the snooze button.
  • A relationship with no trust is like having a phone with no service: you just play games.
  • If homework goes too easy you are doing it wrong.
  • Boy: “You look nice today” girl: “Was I ugly yesterday?”
  • That annoying person that gets good grades but does not study much.
  • Offering someone food but secretly hoping they don’t want it.
  • I don’t need a stable relationship. I need a stable internet connection.
  • Pretending to care about your teacher’s personal life just to waste time in class.

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Entertainment

People that make money most during election period in Nigeria

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People that make money most during election period in Nigeria

Election period in Nigeria is one of the times businesses experience growth in their profit chart, well not all businesses. Each campaign rally organized by each political party cost nothing less than 1 million Naria for the cheapest of them. Add together all the logistics and expenses, you would be surprised at how much politicians throw away.

Its in favor of everyone in general, the money gets to circulate again. Everyone gets his or her fair share of money flowing in the circle, but some people doing certain businesses get most of the money during election period and they are listed below.

People that make money most during election period in Nigeria

Printing Press

These ones are the top earners. If there was one printing press in Nigeria, they will make more money in a day than bill gate. How ? Every street and road in Nigeria now is decorated with posters and fliers of all sort, campaign, manifestos, slanders etc. And not less than 100 posters are pasted in each street. Do the math.

So, get your own printing press against 2023 general elections.

Graphic Designers

Graphics designers are the second top earners, the design the printed fliers and they also design the online campaigns. Printing press can decide to be partisan, but graphics designers are not. They are best of any world. And trust me they double the cost when in contact with political parties.

Basic knowledge of Photoshop and the right connections can get you started. But you must really know your thing.

Wears Manufacturing factory

The third most lucrative business during election period in Nigeria. You can’t count the number of customized polo and caps during a political parties’s campaign. Wears manufacturing companies swing into 24 hours work time to meet demands during election periods. They are almost overwhelmed by the demand, so they increase the cost of production and guess what, politicians can afford any price.

Isn’t this a good business ideas ahead of 2023 ?.

Media Houses

Media houses are two times busier during election times. You can barely find a free slot with media houses because politicians own some media houses or have already paid for the free slots. It takes a lot to start up a media company, and it takes a lot to run it, so they’ll charge you a lot for a advert slot.

Stage Makers

These ones organize campaign grounds for parties. Sometimes if you don’t pay them well, they can build a collapsible stage for you, like the one that happened in Kebbi state. So political parties dish out serious amount for these guys and they deliver as much as you can pay.

To start, grab basic furniture making skills and enhance to metal work and general stage setup, then you’re good to go.

Bloggers

Bloggers too make money during election period, its part of their earning means. Displaying political ads online is a fortune generator for every blogger. You can extend to sponsored articles despite its side effect, but its your money right ? With a good blog, you can make up to 100,000 naira in a month.

Have good research and typing skills. Then pick a niche you know that relates with politics then you’re ready.

All of a sudden NGOs

During election period we see sudden spring out of unknown, overnight NGOs that agitate for various movements. Free and fair election, say no to vote buying, credible election, say no to political thuggery, etc. These are some of the topics these “All of a sudden NGOs” agitate for. They have their way of making money from it and its unique to each organization.

Reputable NGO’s perform their civic duties too, but you get to see more NGO in action only during election period.

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#MondayMotivation – Be Kind to Yourself

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Life brings challenges, that’s normal. How you react, that depends on you. You react negative, it turns out negative. No two ways about that. You react positively, it turns out positive. Even when it turns out negative, still stay positive. That’s the best you can do for yourself.

To quench a fire is not by adding fire, you add water. Give yourself  a peace of mind and most importantly try again. You can never be wrong this time. If you become, stay positive and try again.

#MondayMotivation - Be Kind to Yourself

Monday Motivation Quotes

Don’t ask for an easier life, ask to be a stronger person. One who smiles rather than angers is always stronger. – Masentle

Be the reason someone smiles. Be the reason someone feels loved and believes in the goodness in people. – Roy T. Bennett.

Athletes focus on what is in their control. The moment an Athlete starts worrying about things outside their lane, they will not get the results they want. There will always be external pressures, stay in your lane and do what you do. – Kirsty.

You are never too old to:

1 be afraid
2 forgive first
3 learn new skills
4 share wisdom
5 change your mind
6 apologize for mistakes
7 love again
8 make friends
9 be generous
10 choose happiness
11 remove clutter
12 read good books
13 show gratitude
14 try again – Vala.

A great attitude becomes a great mood, Which becomes a great day, Which becomes a great year, Which becomes a great life. – Gunner.

Never think hard about the past, it brings tears…. Don’t think more about the future it brings fears….. Live this moment with a smile, it brings cheers – Nick.

Worry is imagining worst case scenarios that are not yet real over and over in your mind. When you feel overwhelmed, try this: Focus on what actually IS in this NOW moment and breathe through it. Just by doing this, you are changing the future outcome. – Gordana.

No one makes a lock without a key. That’s why God won’t give us difficulties without a solution! – Malume.

Stop shrinking yourself to fit places you’ve outgrown. – Acho.

Don’t let fear or insecurity stop you from pursuing your dreams. Believe in yourself. Do what you love. And never forget how wildly capable you are. – Tommy.

There is no such thing as painless transformation. – Shelton.

Sometimes you Win, Sometimes you LEARN. – SS Kim.

Sometimes life doesn’t give you what you want, not because you don’t deserve it but because you deserve so much more.

You can’t get rich with a job. The society has been programmed to take back your salary. Your job is for surviving. To become rich, you need an idea!!!

The strongest people make time to help others even if they’re struggling with their own personal demons. – Maximum.

Life is always full of ups and downs Work for the best and expect the worst Keep being yourself you must succeed Someday – Jeff.

It’s not who you are that holds you back, it’s who you think you’re not.

The journey of the sun and moon is predictable. But yours, is your ultimate ART. – M. V.

Why get paid 12 times a year when there are 365 days in a year? Find something you love and work on how it can earn you an extra income. – Olivia.

You may be the only person left who believes in you, but it’s enough. It takes just one star to pierce a universe of darkness. Never give up. – Richelle E. Goodrich.

 

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