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TYPES OF SLAPS

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TYPES OF SLAPS

1. TAKE AWAY SLAP: When someone gives
you a dirty slap, and all you can do is hold
your face and walk away.. That is take away
slap.
2. RESOUNDING SLAP: That is when after you
are hit. You keep on hearing some funny
sounds in your brain like wiiiiiiiiiii! and
voices in your head singing Christmas Carol.
3. FORMATTING SLAP: That is the slap that
makes someone forget instantly what he or
she was doing.. You find yourself asking
questions like “what did I do?”
4. EXPLANATION SLAP: When someone gives
you this kind of slap, you find yourself
explaining the situation to the nearest
person out of your own accord..e.g.. Bros,
shey you been dey watch? I been no do
anything o.
5. FIXED DEPOSIT SLAP: When you receive this
kind of slap all you will do is just stand right
where you are and watch the person walk
away.
6. RHETORICAL SLAP: The moment you
download the slap, you start asking
questions that don’t need reply.. like EMILY,
you slapped me?
7. SWEET SLAP: This is the type of slap that
when a girl downloads it sweetly on your
cheek whether is painful or not, you start
blushing.
8. MATHEMATICAL SLAP: This simply has to do
with the physical reconstruction of your face
when given to you. The length of your face
will be raised to power two, your eye
sockets will calculate its circumference.
9. CHERUBIM AND SERAPHIM SLAP: When you
receive this slap (it proves effective when it’s
given to you all of a sudden). You will be
able to speak Spanish, Greek, Arabic, Hindu,
all together.
10. COLOUR RIOT AND BIRDING SLAP: You will
start seeing different colors and your head
will turn to nest whilst birds will be flying all
around you.
WHICH OF THEM HAVE YOU EXPERIENCED OR
WITNESSED???

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Boyfriend chops girlfriend’s head because her food was tasteless

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If you want to read the sad story of a frustrated man who beheaded his girlfriend because the cabbage soup she made was tasteless, stay on this page.

Boyfriend chops girlfriend's head because her food was tasteless

Boyfriend chops girlfriend’s head because her food was tasteless

The anonymous man also tried to take his own life afterwards, but it failed.

Mixed feelings – 😶.

The 43-year-old man  recently lost his job and took to drinking to hopefully suppres the pain.

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Suddenly he became angry when his 47-year-old partner cooked tasteless Shchi (cabbage) soup. He then chopped her head which lead to her death at their home in Kozlovka village, Russia.

Police officers found the body of the dead woman, with her head berated, in Russia, Smolensk region.

The woman’s lover has been detained at the couple’s home and a criminal investigation has been launched according to part 1 article 105 of the Russian criminal code – deliberate murder.

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People lived around said that the man was never that aggressive but after he recently lost his job and started drinking, he went bananas.

Boyfriend chops girlfriend's head because her food was tasteless

Boyfriend chops girlfriend’s head because her food was tasteless

There have been several cases where job loss can make one take the wrong turn in life and do something unimaginable. That’s why laid off workers need a therapist if any unusable behavior is read.

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This is the second case in less than a week in Russia where complaints about bad cooking have resulted in murder.

Linda Ikeji reports that just last week, a woman murdered her husband by stabbing him at least 35 times because he had commented on the food she served their guest.

The husband said that the food she served their guests was lacking salt.

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Local Government Chairman kneeling down after he shouted “APC” during PDP campaign rally

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Francis Ayagah, Local government chairman of Gwer west local government area in Benue state kneeling down as instructed after he chanted “APC” during a PDP campaign rally.

Local Government Chairman kneeling down after he shouted "APC" during PDP campaign rally

Local Government Chairman kneeling down after he shouted “APC” during PDP campaign rally

Don’t put all the blame on Francis Ayagah. He was elected as LG Chairman under the sweeps of APC, but he defected to the umbrella of PDP after power changed hands in Benue state.

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Eunice Ortom, wife of Samuel Ortom, Benue state Governor organized a rally to campaign for the re-election of her husband as Gorvenor. Eunice Ortom hails from the local government which Francis Ayagah leads.

Francis Ayagah was called up to the podium to make a speech. Unfortunately for him, he lost track of the political party’s platform he is on.

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Report has it that he shouted “Aaaaa Peee Ceeee” twice to a crowd of PDP supporters who couldn’t hold back the disgrace.

Subsequently he was summoned by the leaders of PDP in Benue state and was seen kneeling down.

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Power Outage hit Murtala Mohammed Airport for five hours – Read what passengers did

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It came as a shock as Murtala Mohammed Airport in Ikeja Lagos State went into stone age for five hours. The airport experienced power outage which forced the terminal to switch to manual for continuity.

Power Outage hit Lagos Airport for five hours - Read what passengers did

Power Outage hit Lagos Airport for five hours – Read what passengers did

The General Manager, Corporate Communications, FAAN, Henrietta Yakubu, said that the power failure was due to a “minor electrical fault”.

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Sahara Reporters reported that sources close to the terminal reveal that some of the passengers had to pull off their shirt especially the males and use hand fans.

Phew.

Yakubu further stated that FAA  engineers were already working to rectify the “minor electrical fault”, assuring the public that normalcy would be restored soon.

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Yakubu added by saying that the outage did not affect normal flight operations at the airport and flight operations continued uninterrupted.

Well, the terminal crew switched to manual.

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