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Laugh out the stress by reading this jokes

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1) I bought Gucci soap for ¢200 and Gucci sponge for ¢350 and since morning I’ve been looking for where to bath for people to see me
Abeg u people should come to stadium by 7:30 oo…
2) “Most Girls Pray For Hardworking men, Yet They Don’t Respond To Greetings From labourers.”
What ar u expecting
3) Gentlemen No girl is ugly…It’s just that some of them look like their fathers
4) I don’t know what’s wrong with me, If a girl call me darling, i feel like transferring money to her
5) Some Girls Want A Guy That Will Be Checking On Them Every 5minutes…..
Abeg My Sister Are You Livescores??
Let me run ooo…..
6) I have a question for those who don’t eat pork saying that the demons were cast into the pigs… Why do you still drink water since the pigs ran into the river ????
…. _wisdom will not kill me …..
7) This heat is too much, you might think the Government has chewed the money meant for the rains…

Laugh out the stress by reading this jokes

8) I dat survived 9 months in my mom’s belly without light..
Nepa don’t even know me oo..
Since morning they refused to give us power supply and they tink they are doing me …
Abeg let me dance.. Who will join me..
9) I bought power bank for 500 Naira at the junction…And I was very happy it was cheap until my phone started charging the power bank
Abeg what type of witchcraft softwork be that?
10) Yesterday I decided to use this shortcut that passes through a cemetery. Two ladies ran towards me telling me how scared they were walking alone so they joined me.
I told them even me I used to fear when I was alive.
I can’t tell u their speed limit
11)* A mad man at Nsukka Psychiatric hospital
climbed a tree and spent half of the day on
that
tree. All of a sudden, he let go of the branch
he
was holding and fell straight to the ground
with
full force.
One of the Doctors rushed to the scene and
asked him, ”Emeka what’s the matter with
u?”
The mad man gladly replied…
“I DON RIPE”

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12)* That awkward moment when you woke
up
around 1am to urinate and your phone was
just
3%, then coincidentally,nepa brings light,
you went to plug your phone then you go
back to
sleep immediately… You woke up in the
morning around 8am and there was still
light,
you checked your phone and it was 1%,
then
you realize you didn’t switch on the socket….
You switched the socket on immediately,
nepa took the light…
The witches in your village will just whisper
to
your ear— No do, No do, No do gara gara
for
me.
13)* I’m tired of this Dettol
Adverts, children nowadays believe there
are Germs
everywhere….
My 5 yr old Nephew goes around with
a Dettol can in his
pocket. He Sprinkles his friends
before he plays
with them…..
Sprinkles his books
before reading…..
This morning, my tea and bread tasted
awful…I Took a few sips n bites
before I realized
my
Nephew had poured
Dettol in my Breakfast to kill germs…. If my
nephew doesn’t kill
me,who
will?
14)* The way African people are black.if you
shoot
them at night,the bullet will come back and
ask for a torchlight

  I Thought I Have Seen Enough Joke Of The Day

Read Also: Strange fire kills family of four in Lagos

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Boyfriend chops girlfriend’s head because her food was tasteless

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If you want to read the sad story of a frustrated man who beheaded his girlfriend because the cabbage soup she made was tasteless, stay on this page.

Boyfriend chops girlfriend's head because her food was tasteless

Boyfriend chops girlfriend’s head because her food was tasteless

The anonymous man also tried to take his own life afterwards, but it failed.

Mixed feelings – 😶.

The 43-year-old man  recently lost his job and took to drinking to hopefully suppres the pain.

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Suddenly he became angry when his 47-year-old partner cooked tasteless Shchi (cabbage) soup. He then chopped her head which lead to her death at their home in Kozlovka village, Russia.

Police officers found the body of the dead woman, with her head berated, in Russia, Smolensk region.

The woman’s lover has been detained at the couple’s home and a criminal investigation has been launched according to part 1 article 105 of the Russian criminal code – deliberate murder.

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People lived around said that the man was never that aggressive but after he recently lost his job and started drinking, he went bananas.

Boyfriend chops girlfriend's head because her food was tasteless

Boyfriend chops girlfriend’s head because her food was tasteless

There have been several cases where job loss can make one take the wrong turn in life and do something unimaginable. That’s why laid off workers need a therapist if any unusable behavior is read.

  Girls And Better Life

This is the second case in less than a week in Russia where complaints about bad cooking have resulted in murder.

Linda Ikeji reports that just last week, a woman murdered her husband by stabbing him at least 35 times because he had commented on the food she served their guest.

The husband said that the food she served their guests was lacking salt.

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Local Government Chairman kneeling down after he shouted “APC” during PDP campaign rally

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Francis Ayagah, Local government chairman of Gwer west local government area in Benue state kneeling down as instructed after he chanted “APC” during a PDP campaign rally.

Local Government Chairman kneeling down after he shouted "APC" during PDP campaign rally

Local Government Chairman kneeling down after he shouted “APC” during PDP campaign rally

Don’t put all the blame on Francis Ayagah. He was elected as LG Chairman under the sweeps of APC, but he defected to the umbrella of PDP after power changed hands in Benue state.

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Eunice Ortom, wife of Samuel Ortom, Benue state Governor organized a rally to campaign for the re-election of her husband as Gorvenor. Eunice Ortom hails from the local government which Francis Ayagah leads.

Francis Ayagah was called up to the podium to make a speech. Unfortunately for him, he lost track of the political party’s platform he is on.

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Report has it that he shouted “Aaaaa Peee Ceeee” twice to a crowd of PDP supporters who couldn’t hold back the disgrace.

Subsequently he was summoned by the leaders of PDP in Benue state and was seen kneeling down.

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Power Outage hit Murtala Mohammed Airport for five hours – Read what passengers did

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It came as a shock as Murtala Mohammed Airport in Ikeja Lagos State went into stone age for five hours. The airport experienced power outage which forced the terminal to switch to manual for continuity.

Power Outage hit Lagos Airport for five hours - Read what passengers did

Power Outage hit Lagos Airport for five hours – Read what passengers did

The General Manager, Corporate Communications, FAAN, Henrietta Yakubu, said that the power failure was due to a “minor electrical fault”.

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Sahara Reporters reported that sources close to the terminal reveal that some of the passengers had to pull off their shirt especially the males and use hand fans.

Phew.

Yakubu further stated that FAA  engineers were already working to rectify the “minor electrical fault”, assuring the public that normalcy would be restored soon.

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Yakubu added by saying that the outage did not affect normal flight operations at the airport and flight operations continued uninterrupted.

Well, the terminal crew switched to manual.

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