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Read this jokes and never stop laughing

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Read this jokes and never stop laughing

1-American burial: it was successful
Nigerian: salt no dey their jeroff rice seff ..
Nigeria nawa ooo

2-If actions are louder than words,why are
we learning English instead of Kung- Fu??
Wisdom will kill me one day

3-Sum girls b lyk baby I’m not feeling fine ,
send me mtn 1000. Wat do u need airtime
for? U want to recharge ur sickness?

4-Mayorkun-MAMA
Tecno-MAMA
Kissdaniel-MAMA
Why am I having this feeling dat dis celebrity
don’t have fathers

5-I have been crying since morning
When one Owerri girl said she prefers
Facebook to social media
#Chai

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6-The worst relationship breakup is the one
announced by the gateman..
“Oga say make I no open gate for you”..

7-I don’t even understand my landlord
anymore…. I nearly punched him in the face
today…..When he gets beaten by his wife
then he extends his anger on me..
Can you imagine he said my bulb is making
noise???

8-Even if you are a ghost Nigerian police
must say anything just to arrest you …. you
will hear where is your ghost licence and
your lying in state particulars

9-If u tell your boyfriend that u are bathing
&
he doesn’t ask for a nude ….
Hey girl you are single,just move on
No lie

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10-The keke i entered today jammed a
Range
Rover Sport 2017 model
All of us inside the keke jumped out and ran
away including the driver

11-Sarkodie rap be like..
Wad else
You know say money no be problem
Ogede to pon Bede
Yeppp
Hgajajhuyyjadurr NOW
Gujugadatzzahiguan HOW
Gujudaefasariduarjimegitenfuadie SURE
MenushidegenedenJavan PURE

only God knows what this man is saying…

12-My sister stop asking guys what they do
for a living,they will lie.Just take them to bed
and count how many rounds they can do
-1 round = rich guy
-2 rounds = doing well in life
-3 rounds = Unemployed
-4 rounds = Broke as hell
Thank me later my sister.My wisdom will still
post quotes even if I die

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13-Do you know that those people who
were sold during slave trade are now black
Americans??, enjoying America and Europe.
but my stubborn grandfather refused to be
sold,
See me nah…. now am a Nigerian shouting
up Nepa up & down

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Boyfriend chops girlfriend’s head because her food was tasteless

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If you want to read the sad story of a frustrated man who beheaded his girlfriend because the cabbage soup she made was tasteless, stay on this page.

Boyfriend chops girlfriend's head because her food was tasteless

Boyfriend chops girlfriend’s head because her food was tasteless

The anonymous man also tried to take his own life afterwards, but it failed.

Mixed feelings – ūüė∂.

The 43-year-old man  recently lost his job and took to drinking to hopefully suppres the pain.

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Suddenly he became angry when his 47-year-old partner cooked tasteless Shchi (cabbage) soup. He then chopped her head which lead to her death at their home in Kozlovka village, Russia.

Police officers found the body of the dead woman, with her head berated, in Russia, Smolensk region.

The woman’s lover has been detained at the couple’s home and a criminal investigation has been launched according to part 1 article 105 of the Russian criminal code ‚Äď deliberate murder.

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People lived around said that the man was never that aggressive but after he recently lost his job and started drinking, he went bananas.

Boyfriend chops girlfriend's head because her food was tasteless

Boyfriend chops girlfriend’s head because her food was tasteless

There have been several cases where job loss can make one take the wrong turn in life and do something unimaginable. That’s why laid off workers need a therapist if any unusable behavior is read.

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This is the second case in less than a week in Russia where complaints about bad cooking have resulted in murder.

Linda Ikeji reports that just last week, a woman murdered her husband by stabbing him at least 35 times because he had commented on the food she served their guest.

The husband said that the food she served their guests was lacking salt.

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Local Government Chairman kneeling down after he shouted “APC” during PDP campaign rally

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Francis Ayagah, Local government chairman of Gwer west local government area in Benue state kneeling down as instructed after he chanted “APC” during a PDP campaign rally.

Local Government Chairman kneeling down after he shouted "APC" during PDP campaign rally

Local Government Chairman kneeling down after he shouted “APC” during PDP campaign rally

Don’t put all the blame on Francis Ayagah. He was elected as LG Chairman under the sweeps of APC, but he defected to the umbrella of PDP after power changed hands in Benue state.

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Eunice Ortom, wife of Samuel Ortom, Benue state Governor organized a rally to campaign for the re-election of her husband as Gorvenor. Eunice Ortom hails from the local government which Francis Ayagah leads.

Francis Ayagah was called up to the podium to make a speech. Unfortunately for him, he lost track of the political party’s platform he is on.

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Report has it that he shouted “Aaaaa Peee Ceeee” twice to a crowd of PDP supporters who couldn’t hold back the disgrace.

Subsequently he was summoned by the leaders of PDP in Benue state and was seen kneeling down.

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Power Outage hit Murtala Mohammed Airport for five hours – Read what passengers did

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It came as a shock as Murtala Mohammed Airport in Ikeja Lagos State went into stone age for five hours. The airport experienced power outage which forced the terminal to switch to manual for continuity.

Power Outage hit Lagos Airport for five hours - Read what passengers did

Power Outage hit Lagos Airport for five hours – Read what passengers did

The¬†General Manager, Corporate Communications, FAAN,¬†Henrietta Yakubu, said that the power failure was due to a “minor electrical fault”.

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Sahara Reporters reported that sources close to the terminal reveal that some of the passengers had to pull off their shirt especially the males and use hand fans.

Phew.

Yakubu further stated that FAA¬† engineers were already working to rectify the “minor electrical fault”, assuring the public that normalcy would be restored soon.

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Yakubu added by saying that the outage did not affect normal flight operations at the airport and flight operations continued uninterrupted.

Well, the terminal crew switched to manual.

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